Could You Please Just Listen?

Could you please just listen?

My baby has died. Please don't tell me you know how I feel .
You don't. You can't. I hope you never do. Don't tell me that
she's with God and I should be happy. How can I be happy
when every time I go to her nursery all I see is an empty crib
and toys that will never be played with? How can I be happy
when my arms ache to hold her?

Please don't tell me God needed another angel. It's hard for
me to understand why God would take away this little one
who was so loved. Maybe I will understand later. But for
right now...let God find another angel. Please, please,
please don't tell me I'll have other children. Maybe I will...
but my daughter was not a puppy that ran away...
she can't be replaced.

Maybe you could just listen when I remember out loud
all the things we did together...the walks, the early
morning feedings, the first time she rolled over.
Maybe you could just sit with me while
I cry over all the things we'll never do together.

Please don't tell me it could be worse. How?

I really don't want to hear about your grandfather's death.
It's not the same. Don't think my pain will be eased by
comparison. Of course I'm glad that she didn't suffer,
but I'd be a lot happier if she hadn't died at all.

I know it must be hard for you, but would you mind looking
at her picture just one more time, we don't have many of her
and I'm just a little bit afraid that I may forget what she
looked like. She wasn't here that long you know.

Could you please just listen?

Don't tell me I'll get over it. There is no "over it", only
through it. Maybe you could just be with me while
I take my first steps through it. Please don't tell me I
should be glad she was just a baby, or that at least I
didn't get to know her. I knew her before I saw her.
She was a part of me. And now she's gone. I haven't
just lost a four-month old baby. I lost a part of myself.

I know you mean well, but please don't expect me to
tell you how to help me. I'd tell you if I knew, but right
now I can hardly put one foot in front of the other.
Maybe if you looked around, you could find some
things to do, like taking my dog for a walk, or doing
the dishes, or making some coffee.

PLEASE DON'T TRY TO REMOVE MY PAIN
OR DISTRACT ME FROM IT. I HAVE TO FEEL
THIS WAY FOR NOW.

By Debbie Gemmill



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